I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
