Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize