best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
