Banned from zoo.
Again?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
