I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
my poor anus
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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