Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You need Xanax blowdarts
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You're breaking my sexual little heart
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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