I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
