he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
My dick has a subreddit
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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