Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Randomize
