I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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