called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
