If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
