Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
