I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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