I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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