seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
