I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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