fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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