She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
