Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
