If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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