I cannot find my penis.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
PANTIES FOUND
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