I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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