How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
