one two three fourrrrnication!
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
