I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
