He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
My hand turned me down
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
then he tried to convert me to islam
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
