well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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