ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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