i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
