FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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