Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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