PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
