so explain again why im purple
no
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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