im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
