I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize