Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
