do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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