i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
