Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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