He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Randomize
