Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
