okay pat passed out under dana's car
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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