dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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