Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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