About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
