youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize