Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
