yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize