You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
My vagina is very pro this idea
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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